You’ve all seen them: the articles plastered on the front of Yahoo!, Men’s Health, People, Maxim, Cosmo, GQ, etc., etc. They come with titles like, “The 10 Things Men wish Women Knew” or “What Guys Really Want in a Woman”. They promise women insight into the inner-workings of a man’s mind from the actual minds of the average man… and almost always fall short.
As men, competitive by nature, our curiosity drives us to wonder whether our ideal woman stacks up against other ‘real men’, so, we click on these articles, scroll through the post, and then, BAM: a celebrity explaining that “We don’t mind shopping with you… as long as we get to pick out the clothes”.
Look, there are some things that these articles get right, but in many cases, the asinine crap that they spew drives real men up a wall. So, we at CoolDudeStuff would like to put some of these myths to rest, and compile a real list of a) what we want in a woman, and b) what men wish women knew about men.
What a real man wants in a woman:
Natural IS better
OK, this is one thing that almost all articles get right. Nothing is more sexy that a naturally beautiful woman who doesn’t feel the need to “put on a mask” every day. However, do not read this as an invitation to skip shaving for the week ladies. While we prefer a minimalist approach to makeup and despise layers of foundation that make you look like a china doll, we do not want to see you with hairy pits or legs. Period.
Have a Sense of Humor
Another thing that most articles get right is having a sense of humor. We aren’t necessarily looking for a stand-up comedian, but we’re not looking for a librarian either. All a guy wants is someone who shares a similar taste in movies, can laugh at stupid jokes, and doesn’t take themselves too seriously. Simply put: laugh with us, and occasionally, at us.
Take Pride in Your Appearance
Look, a girl doesn’t need to be a supermodel (not that it hurts), but we do care that they pay attention to their appearance. We understand that nobody will look the way they did when they were 18 years old, but maintaining physical fitness and overall appearance is extremely sexy while the opposite is a huge turnoff. Also, and more importantly, if a chick feels good about their appearance, they are more likely to be confident in the bedroom.
Have a Little Ambition
Now, there are two schools of thought on ambitious women. The first is that a guy can feel threatened by a woman who is successful, which, for insecure, little men can be the case. However, real men find ambition sexy, whether it be professionally, athletically, or in another area of a girl’s life. While we like to be able to provide for our woman, it is nice to know that she has the intestinal fortitude to complete a task on her own every now and again. Nothing is sexier than a girl taking pride in what she does and nothing is more of a downer than a girl who constantly complains about her job.
Be Little Miss Congeniality
No, I don’t mean that stupid movie, although a chick wielding a gun IS pretty hot. I mean, work at mixing well with a wide range of people. There are few bigger turn-offs than a girl who is constantly starting drama at gatherings, who is unable to converse with people they don’t know, and who limits our ability to enjoy our surroundings because we are constantly required to entertain them.
Have Your Own Friends
Along the same lines as the aforementioned note on being congenial is having friends of their own. While we love that our girl gets along with our friends and while we do like spending time with them, it is imperative that a guy is able to have ‘guy time’ without feeling obligated to bring his girl along. Again, while we appreciate their slight dependence on us, we are not event coordinators and besides, if they don’t have girls to whom they can vent their problems, guess who gets to listen… Yeah, no thanks.
Learn to Love Sports
Ideally, this isn’t something that they would need to learn as our ideal woman is athletic, toned, and a sports buff but in many cases, they weren’t blessed with athletic abilities and played with dolls as a kid. That is fine, as long as they make an effort to appreciate the things we appreciate later in life, namely, sports. Or, at the absolute least, don’t give us crap for caring.
Be Confident, Damnit
Probably the most important item on this list is what a girl thinks about herself. We can all deal with the “do these jeans make my butt look fat” comment from time to time, but that is where it should end. A girl is sexiest when she feels great, knows she’s hot, regardless of the attire, and is not constantly questioning whether we are checking out other girls. I mean, we totally are, but if a girl is confident, it shouldn’t matter, because they know we are going home with them, and as mentioned before, that confidence will manifest itself into better sexy time later.
What we wish women knew:
We love when you look sporty – A girl don’t always have to dress like a $2 hooker to get us going. Sometimes seeing her in running shoes, shorts, and one of those tight tops with their hair in a pony tail is a bigger turn on than a mini skirt and high-heels.
You can have sex with us any time you want – Seriously. No explanation needed. Any. Time. You. Want.
We know when you fake it – Look, we know when you fake it, and it’s really kind of obvious, but we don’t want to make you feel dumb.
Don’t sweat the small stuff – When you get angry over some stupid little pointless thing, we question your intelligence. Seriously.
A little crazy is ok – Knowing that you care enough to get mildly crazy is actually a bit endearing, but when you wander into “I’ll cut my wrists if you leave me” territory, it’s time for you to go.
PDA’s can be ok – A random unexpected grope is always welcome, even in public. Especially in public.
Learn to cook – OK, this isn’t exactly revolutionary, but the way to our hearts is truly through our stomachs. Learn to cook and we are yours.
No, you don’t know us better than we know ourselves – OK, sometimes we agree with you just to shut you up, but no one knows us better than we know ourselves.
PMS – I don’t care. PMS is not an excuse to be a raging b@tch. Period. **giggle**
We really don’t want to talk about it – When we look like we’re having a bad day but say, “I don’t want to talk about it”, we don’t secretly mean, force me to talk about it. Guys don’t work that way. For the most part, what you see if what you get.
Shopping is a chore – Look, no matter how many articles tell a girl that “we don’t mind shopping with you, as long as we get to pick out what you try on”, it will never be true, unless the guy is gay. Guys DO NOT LIKE SHOPPING. Unless you are planning on bringing us into the dressing room and having sex with us, there are literally thousands of other things we would rather be doing.
So, maybe this list isn’t revolutionary to chicks in steady relationships, but for those who continuously search, date, and then are back on the prowl a month later, maybe you should forward this onto them. They may end up thanking you for it.
If you have items you would like to have added to this list, email us at info [at] cooldudestuff [dot] com or sound off below in the comments.